Rot & Decay | Dead to Fall | Dead To Fall

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Rot & Decay

by Dead to Fall

supported by

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Full Digital Discography

Get all 4 Dead To Fall releases available on Bandcamp and save 50%.

Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of Rot & Decay, Empire of Pines, Cerro de la Muerte, and No One Is Coming to Help. , and , .

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about

his one is tough to write about.

It’s mostly about the end of my marriage, and the frailty I felt around myself afterward. I keep spiraling close to healing and then closer to wanting to disappear from the earth more than ever. I find myself climbing back into the person I am, rediscovering what makes me - me. I go through waves of feeling content and perfectly fine, and then wanting to rot away and be forgotten. If I can do that then there is more impact on anyone and no one can have any impact on me.

There are the walls of protection - no one gets in but I can’t get out. I coupled this with some writing I did at what felt like the edge world - A Volcano next to a crumbling 500-year-old Portuguese fort in the Azores facing the sea. The fortresses we build to save us from intruders physically and mentally - decay, they crumble. The pain still gets in and the protections fail. Always.

Another part of this is just how exhausted I am with the “healing” process. I don’t want to do it anymore. I should be done, but the panic still sets in and I make decisions based solely on fear. Try to self-medicate, try to meditate, try to talk it out, each fixes the symptoms momentarily but the fact of the matter is everything still hurts. There are conflicting statements in this song because they are all true moments of self-talk - I Can’t Change, I am broken, timeless, worthless, perfect. There’s no end to this, but it does get easier….I hope

lyrics

Thawing out my frozen heart
Giving up is always the hardest part
Tracing out the faded scars
One last breath - as I fall apart

Day after day, I still can't find my way
Just a bottomless hole of never-ending pain
Try to hold it all in but I can't contain
I can’t change

I've lost fiber of connection
Joy nor sorrow can hold my attention
As much as I try something is missing
I am Broken

Never mourned the piece that died
Adrift, Wretched lost in the tide
I can't get back to what I once was
I am timeless

Burning, yearning to fade away
Forget me, let me rot and decay

“Do the work” I’m tired, it hurts
Wall myself off from all the lessons I’ve learned
No one gets in but I can't get out
I am Worthless

Locked inside my crumbling hope
Self-sabotaged, drowned, and choked
I don't need you or want you at all
I am perfect

Monuments to moments, fortresses that hold them
The facade is breaking apart, crumbling core, violent start
No more purpose, no more pain, it’s just too exhausting to try to explain
no more past, no more home, just leave me alone

Burning, yearning to fade away
Forget me, let me, rot and decay

credits

released September 15, 2022
Engineered and Mixed by Pete Grossmann at Bricktop Recording in Chicago
Mastered by Brad Boatright at Audiosiege
Artwork by Chris Lopinto

license

all rights reserved

tags

about

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Dead To Fall Chicago, Illinois

Jon Hunt (vocals)
Bryan Lear (guitar)
Justin Jakimiak (bass)
Antone Jones (guitar)
Timothy Java (drums)

dadtofall.com

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